Wednesday, March 25, 2009

The Glass Palace

I read the Glass Palace by Amitav Ghosh.
A vast novel, big, weighty and with a lot of people and time packed into 500 pages of text. Though I read it in 2 days flat which says a lot about the flow and ease of writing, I did come away with a bit of queasiness in the stomach. Like a promise that was not quite kept.
I think I have now read about all of Amitav Ghosh's fiction and nothing has excited me as much as the Calcutta Chromosome. The second best would undoubtedly be the Sea of poppies.
I wish he would hurry up and get through with his sequel.

Saturday, March 21, 2009

2 stripes

yesterday was the day when the one probable stripe became 2 definite stripes. Does that mean something?
Of course it does. It means that i am ok and it was money well spent all these years.

Friday, March 20, 2009

So Much Anger

I am the only brother in 7 siblings. I am unique, the only one. I have had good times and bad times, more bad than good. And I have so much anger within me. Anger at so many people who have done me wrong. My relatives, for instance. My uncles who have been worse than enemies might be. I am angry at them and I never want to see them. And that is my only condition for happiness and peace. My sister is getting engaged, she is happy, everyone is happy. But I dont want my uncles to be there. The elders in my family decide to call them for the sake of appearances, social niceties. I am not told of it, or if I am, I hope I wont have to see them. I really dont remember and as I said, I just have too much anger and there was a buzzing in my ears as I heard their names being mentioned.
At the party, I see one of my uncles, he too has apparently come there for the sake of appearances, social niceties. And I get really angry. I mean how dare he be there when I was sure I never wanted to see them. But here they are, and I need to take revenge. I have so much anger. I need to make them sorry, all of them. The uncle who decided to come, the elders in my family who thought it might not be such a bad idea, and everyone else who does not think the way I do. I have to do something to make them remember for all times, and finally cement the antagonism with anger, sorrow and guilt. I tell one of my relatives that I cant bear this anymore and I have to go. I dont think he notices very much, he is having a good time.
I go home and take this medicine, shortly afterwards, through a haze I am taken somewhere and suddenly, in a matter of minutes, the discomfort is over.
My sister is in a hospital, she has not eaten in a couple of days and she wont speak. She is being looked at by a big, disinterested doctor who has probably seen this before. Nothing much to worry about, he opines, and I agree.She will be fine soon.
My anger is a little less now.

Thursday, March 05, 2009


Originally uploaded by cicadas17 the rose garden
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